[#285]FERNANDA LLORA, DEL CUARTEL MILITAR al CAMPO MINADO, el DIA MAS DURO en AFGANISTÁN

[#285]FERNANDA LLORA, DEL CUARTEL MILITAR al CAMPO MINADO, el DIA MAS DURO en AFGANISTÁN

They’ve also turned on my camera, I had it on IN THE PREVIOUS CHAPTER . Everyone’s going to hit them there, you’ll see, a camping spot. We’ve found a kind of fortress made of mud here. Well, we’re going to sleep here and see if no one comes because people are appearing under the rocks here. We’re at 2,000 meters. It’s cold and I think it’s going to be a chilly night, so we’ll see how we set it up so we don’t get too cold. Luckily I saw it because we’re going. It’s been our salvation because it’s super-cluttered and camping in an open field is too conspicuous. Have you seen what a restaurant looked like? And the Taliban were there. Well, imagine. Well, imagine camping in the middle of the field, like, with nothing to cover us. Crazy. So, nothing. We’ll take out the awning and put it over the tent because we’re at over 2,000 meters and it’ll be freezing. It’s already cold. Above all, the problem is that if someone comes and finds out we’re here, the whole town will come, and that’s the problem. And the night of peace and quiet is over. Well, guys, we’re camped here in the middle of nowhere. There are small villages, but they’re all made of mud. Yes, and as you’ve seen, this was supposedly an old market or something, also made of mud, and we’ve come in here because the problem is that if we enter a place and someone sees us coming in, people start coming, and the whole town comes, and those from the next town over, and it’s impossible to sleep or be calm. Well, there’s a dirt road here that goes to a small village in the distance, where there are four mud houses, and every now and then a car or motorcycle passes by. Well, the day has been tough and intense, like every day here in Afghanistan. Well, this is crazy. We stopped to eat. Have you seen what’s happened? The Taliban with the stick was telling people to leave, to leave, to leave, to leave because there were so many people that the road was blocked off, cars couldn’t get through, and we were inside the bar packed with people. There were 300 people on the motorcycles, but nobody was touching anything. Luckily, in the end, well, we ate badly and we left. We ate some really weird soup that you saw, I don’t know, and some fries, refried in a sauce, I don’t know, but anyway, sauce, some kind of oil that was horrible, horrible. The hardest part was when we got past the Taliban checkpoint. It was the fifth checkpoint we’d passed in a hundred or so kilometers, the fifth or sixth, where they’d stopped us because there were more, but some didn’t stop us. Of course, we saw it, we were both sitting there, calm. Of course, we looked at the one on the right, which was the one next to us, and he didn’t say anything. And we, well, that’s it, we went through. I hear. Oh, Fernanda was already ahead. I heard too, but I didn’t go any further, okay? And I said, “Well, I’ll go through because normally, many times at many checkpoints we’ve gone through in other countries, well, you just pretend you don’t see them and that’s it.” And here too. And I thought, well, that’s where it ended. A motorcycle went by on the left very quickly. I was behind Fernanda and it started like, “Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop,” and I said, “Fernanda, Fernanda, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop the Taliban.” And we stopped and the guy came up with a bad idea, “Damn, don’t you see the checkpoint,” and I smiled, shook his hand and the guy’s face changed a little. They really didn’t understand anything we said. They don’t speak English, they don’t speak anything but Pashto, but that’s what you convey. You convey calmness, you convey a smile and then they relax and their expressions change, right? That’s the trick. They asked us for papers, he was making several calls and he said we’d accompany him to the checkpoint, that we should turn around. He took my passport and we left, because Fernanda always treats her there as if she were on the sidelines, they don’t pay any attention to her. We turned around and went to the checkpoint. I mean, how much the guy must have run, you know? With that motorcycle. There were two of them, too. And then we got there and there were a lot of people, Taliban. You saw it, we recorded, something was cut off, shaking hands with everyone, started to make him laugh with the photos, Can I take photos? Yes, yes, and someone wanted to give them my WhatsApp number and write it on their arm, and I wrote it there, writing it on their arm. We were there for about an hour or so, more or less. They made several more calls and asked us for a piece of paper they gave us in Kandahar, which was written by a Taliban leader. The paper says they should treat us well, that we can take photographs, and such. Of course, that’s in every region we go to. And well, they took some photos, then a leader came, then the commander came. Well, the looks these guys have with a Kalashnikov, it’s scary, you can’t even imagine. These guys have killed people, they’ve fired more shots, and they’ve had more wars. Of course, but just as soon as they smile at you, these people will cut your throat. I mean, they don’t have the same… I don’t know, it’s a very strange thing to explain, but they’re very kind sometimes, but when they get really wild, well, in the end, well, they gave us the papers, Fernanda recorded a little, they didn’t say anything to her, one went to see her and another said, “No, she’s a woman.” And then she left. They asked me what was mine two or three times, also that they only had one woman. I said yes, that for now, here in Spain, we go one at a time. And well, with signs and all that, things went well, and in the end, they let us go. And what about you, darling? Well, I don’t do anything. Since I never have any say in anything, well, I just keep quiet, listen, and observe. They’ve marginalized the poor thing. And the road, have you seen it? The road, well, the bridges are all collapsed. Come on. And it’s cold, right? Are you cold or something? You see, I’m preparing for what’s coming. We’re camped at 2,000 meters and it’s pretty cold. Tomorrow we’ll arrive in Kabul, and well, it’ll be an adventure getting there. The road is getting worse and worse. It’s full of potholes. There are some lanes in the asphalt that sink from the trucks that are a foot deep, and your wheel gets stuck there. I was about to crash. Fernanda was there too. Tell us what happened to you. Did you see it? No. Well, phew, my heart stops. I mean, he was in the back, he’s already rolled over. But okay, he made it through. Anyway, let’s go to sleep, and tomorrow will be another day. We’ll show you the campsite tomorrow. So, good night, and we’ll see you tomorrow morning. Well, look how frozen everything is, the bikes. Look, we put the awning over it to take the frost off. And well, we’re off to Kabul, we still have 200-something kilometers left. Let’s see if we make it today. Well, the situation. We’re 250 km from Kabul. We had a big mess yesterday, as you’ve seen. Well, we put the awning up to dry. Thank goodness we did, otherwise it’s been freezing tonight, although it’s here where the sun hasn’t hit it. It was -2 degrees Celsius just now. Tonight it’ll have been -5-6 for sure. Well, it’s been cool, but we’ve handled it more or less well. Thanks to the fact we put the awning up, because this tent, for example, is very summery. It’s great for summer, it’s lacking in winter, it’s lacking in winter. So, well, with the awning up, it’s done very well. And well, look where we are. Over there in the background, you can see a small town. All the houses here are made of mud, you see? Mud with stones. So, this would have been a square before, a market. There’s Fernandita in the bathroom. Well, as you can see, Afghanistan is being tough, very intense, very intense, every day an adventure. We take the road. The road is destroyed, the bridges are destroyed. Every 6, 7, 8, sometimes 15 km, there’s a Taliban checkpoint. The Taliban come at us with a bad face, then you have to face them with a smile, try to change their expression because they don’t understand anything you’re saying. “What do we have in our suitcases?” “What’s up?” I act crazy, start smiling at them, shake their hands, and it’s the only way we’re weathering them. It’s complicated, it’s really complicated, very complicated to move forward. Yesterday we left in the morning, we only covered 200-something kilometers all day. Imagine, and it gets dark around 4:30, and by 5:00 we have to be out with the tent already setting it up. Well, as you can see, Fernandita’s feeling bad, right, honey? What’s wrong? Her stomach hurts, she’s dizzy. I’m feeling sick. I think the soup I told you about yesterday is very strange. She’s had her faults. During the night, I couldn’t sleep. I had to go outside twice to see if she was going to throw up. Then I think I had a fever during the night, and now in the morning, well, I’m dizzy. You see. I start walking, my vision goes dark. Okay, but she’s a tough girl. Oh, yes. What can we do? What a honeymoon I’m giving you, huh, honey. Yes, a marvelous trip through Afghanistan. I told her I’d take her on our honeymoon, and we’ve been going around for four years. Yes, the truth is that Fernanda’s a little fed up with here; she wants to leave, huh, it’s very intense and all that. Well, and she doesn’t really get dizzy either; they keep her there, always apart. When they realize she’s a woman, the other day when the Taliban shook her hand, it was a real coup, and everyone, right? She’s a woman. The man did just that. I think he went off to pray headfirst, come on. Of course, he was with the executioner. What the man couldn’t understand was that she was a woman. I mean, it just doesn’t sink in , on the motorcycle. So, of course. And then another guy went to give it to him a while later, and others told him, “No, no, no, no, no, no.” It’s incredible what they do with women here. It’s incredible. It’s like, I don’t know, like a monument. She’s there, they can’t see her, they can’t touch her, they can’t photograph her, they can’t do anything to her, right? At home, when they take her out, they take her out covered up to their throats. Anyway, a culture from 500 years ago, but it is what it is. If you want to come here, you have to adapt, some of you. When they saw Fernanda with the berry, Negra, they told her, “In the photo, they told her, she has to go like this.” She has to go like this. And they gave her masks to wear so her face couldn’t be seen, but anyway, she doesn’t put them on. And for the moment, since she’s a tourist, they haven’t said anything to her either. It’s true that when we were with the Taliban dressed in the baya and her veil fell back a little, they told her, “Put it on, put it on properly.” I mean, it’s no problem, right? It’s coming off a little now, it was frozen, the awning was white. We threw it over the tent. Now it’s drying, we pack up and leave, we have a long way to go. Fernada feels terrible. We’ll see because we still have a bit of time until we get to the hotel. We’re going to Kabul to a hotel, to see if she recovers a little there, her stomach is upset, I don’t know. It was the soup the other day that was really strange, I ate it, she thinks I feel fine. How are you, darling? God. Okay, don’t force it, don’t force it, let’s see. God, wait. The accelerator. The accelerator isn’t working. What’s wrong with her? What’s that? Why is she like that? It’s hard. She might have frozen. Oh, God. Ah, that’s great, huh? Damn, every day…. Take the bike out here more in the sun. No, no, force it. We have to remove that first. Let’s check one thing first. Let’s see, it’s here. You see, removing it. Is it frozen? Maybe it is? It’s perfectly fine that the grease has frozen. Well, we’re leaving here. The throttle is fixed now. It’s the clamp. A cable has come loose. I think the cold of the night froze it and then the throttle return cable became loose , and that caused the clamp to come out a little and get stuck. I mean, we have to tighten it and grease it, but we’re going to do it in Kabul. Let’s go because Fernanda has diarrhea, bad, a problem. The screw, the screw. God , the asphalt is terrible . Look at the asphalt. You take that and, of course, the problem is you’re driving in a lane trying not to get in there, a truck comes right at you because they overtake you as soon as you’re coming, you have to move out of the way and you can’t get out of there. The wheel spits out at you. It’s a problem. You have to be extremely careful, which is why it’s super dangerous here at night. Besides, with the Taliban, it’s better during the day than at night. You have to be really careful. God. God, fuck. How is all this? God. The whole road is the same, huh? It’s not going to give us a break. Look at the poor children there, it’s so cold. Imagine how cold they must be in the houses. There’s no electricity, there’s nothing. Those poles don’t have any cables. Those electricity poles you see there, they don’t have any power anywhere. In the cities, they cut it off three or four days a week. and then only 10 hours of light. They stopped us. Passport. Ah, he’s going to make a phone call. God, I’m going to take off my helmet. Hello . Did you see it was a woman and she turned around? She’s leaving now , okay? I’m going to take it off so we’re more familiar. Okay, okay, I’m sick, huh? They all have such unfriendly faces. Okay, Jodafes, Jodafes is Farsi, it doesn’t matter. How do you say it in Pashto? I have no idea, right? There were tomatoes, there were fruits and vegetables. Look here. Here, here, here. Something very quick. I’m not going down, okay? No. What did he buy? Tomato, cucumber, apple that’s here on the right, and banana. People start to come out. Let’s see, how are we doing? Come on, let’s go. Start. Taliban. I shit on….. Already? That’s it. Should we follow him, right? Of course. God. Fuck it. We were doing so well, damn . Of course, people stop around, they stop. Well, that’s it. Come on, this guy asks for our papers too. Fuck, what a mess, really, it’s a problem every time you stop. Fucking go to the barracks. God. Okay. Yes. Surrounded by Taliban. God, we’re in the barracks. They’ve put us in a barracks here. Wow, they’ve got some weapons. You can take pictures of me, right? And I can’t take pictures of women. No, no, no, no. Off, off. Okay, let’s go. If it’s off, let’s go. They ask if the camera’s off, I say yes, of course. They take us to another part of the barracks to talk to the leaders. This barracks is pretty big. There are a lot of Taliban. Fuck, it’s one after another here, right? Yeah. Oh my God, we stopped to buy some fruit and what a mess we’ve made. Yeah, yeah. Now, where are we going? Somewhere else, God. Somewhere else, I think to see the commander. Holy shit, what a tank is there. God, fuck . The motorcycle won’t fit. No, we’d better leave it outside. Yes, we left it outside. And now he turns off the camera, Yes. AFTER MORE THAN AN HOUR, THEY RELEASE US . Bye, are we leaving? Well, this is inside one of the big barracks of, of the Taliban. They’ve had us there for a while. They’re letting us go now. Let him stop, for a photo for sure . Okay . Okay. Okay. To Kabul. Kabul. Kabula. Okay. Bye, bye. Bye, bye. Okay, let’s go. God, I know to the left. Watch out, there are cars coming. God, every stop is an adventure, right? But the thing is, when you get the hang of it, nothing happens, but when you get it, it’s screwed, like I am now, where my guts are coming out, poor thing. And now the Taliban have given me some medicine that was surely meant to poison me. No way, they’ll take this and it’ll cure everything. A drug, anything will get me high. Go figure, how do I even think of taking it? Nothing, it’s medicine, I told him it’s for my stomach, and he told me this is good for my stomach. That’s it. Okay, guys, when you got in there, the guy was there with the Kalasnikow, I told him, Kalasnikow, pointing it at me the whole time, you know? And in the end the other one said, “No, no, turn the Kalashnikov around,” and he already did. Let’s see if he’s going to shoot and you’ll never know. Ugh, the truth is that they put you in there and you have to keep a cool head, you know? Because… Fuck, if they don’t catch your eye, he might never leave that barracks. Yeah, yeah. God, that one was big, huh? The biggest we’ve ever been in, right? And the one with the most Taliban. Yeah, I was talking to the commander there, they searched me to get in, obviously, for everything. And they searched us to get in, but then they don’t look at the motorcycle bags because if I’m going in alone, of course, well, well, if I carry a pistol, I carry a weapon, if I had a suicide belt, he touched me from behind, all over, eh, in case I had some explosives. Well, what are we going to tell you? This next thing is really tough, come on, tense. Of course, it’s hard for us to get in. Well Imagine. I don’t know why they don’t call the, I mean, a checkpoint. There’s no commander-in-chief. When they see us, they call him, they make five or six calls. It’s that they’re in disarray and they can’t sort things out among themselves. Are they in disarray? Are they going to stop us again or what? No, I don’t think they’ll stop us. No, no, that’s it. This is the control they have in case you skip it, then they call these people here. The truth is that The Taliban live in such conditions. Everyone in general, right? In general, everyone, yes, they do too, right? They’re no better off. You see? The burka is short in the front… They were, they were taking pictures of me just like it was nothing. Yes, they were taking pictures surreptitiously, you know? Yes, but then we can’t take pictures of the women here, right? Of course, if they want to take pictures, they should ask you to. They kept us at the barracks for over an hour. I’ll explain what happened later. Now we urgently need to get to a hotel. Fernandita is feeling terrible with diarrhea, muscle pain, and a very strong headache. We’re looking for a place where she can go to the bathroom, rest, and eat something. Let’s see if it goes away. Rojo, you have to be careful not to go over there, there are mines there. Well, we came here, we hid behind this hut so we could get something to eat. Do you see those flags? There are mines there, that whole area. We came in here, damn it, we found this. So we came out the way we came in. It was really bad, Fernanda’s stomach is in bad shape. We were buying fruit, as you can see. A Taliban man came and we followed him. Well, a lot of people started coming, so they came to see what was going on there, and the Taliban arrived, saw us, Ale, inside. He put us in some really big barracks. They frisked me, we went somewhere, then after I got on the motorcycle we went to another place where the commander was, and there they locked me up with everyone, and Fernanda had initially stayed outside. Well, the usual, I gestured that we were going to Kabul, what’s up, what’s up, smiling, shaking everyone’s hand, first of all, good vibes, such and such, until I got him to smile, and there was one with Kalasnikow there who was pointing the whole time, and in the end I said, “Hey, Kalasnikow, no, yes, such and such.” And so the commander would notice, and then the commander told him to turn the weapon around, and then they invited me to sit with them and then the passport, the document they made for us in Kandahar, they read it, they took photos, then they said it was her, me, my wife, then there was one who spoke four words of English and well, the truth is that it’s very tough because you have to stand there with a happy face, with a good smile because what they can’t do, as I’ve told you many times, is look serious, they don’t understand anything you’re saying to them. And well, there were quite a few, a barracks with a lot of people, there was a tank there too, an hour’s stop, that’s the problem. So, of course, we still have 239 km left. We’ve done barely 60 km since we left this morning and we have to arrive in Kabul during the day. Anyway, we go eat a banana and every time we stop it’s a risk, we stop, a lot of people start coming, when they see people they come to the Taliban and the barracks to ask us for papers. Sure, if it was just a request for the papers and you could leave, perfect. But it’s not that. They’re coming, right now, it’s getting complicated, and then they were secretly taking pictures of Fernanda there. Are you throwing up? And well, on top of that , Fernanda’s in bad shape. Her head and stomach hurt like crazy, I think the soup didn’t agree with her, look. And well, look, yes, cartridges. And well, we’ve gotten into an area and it’s mined, so we’ve hit the nail on the head. Let’s go see if we can eat something and then leave. Look, you see that man over there, wearing a blue suit that’s a vest and a detector, he’s looking for mines. And we’re here eating. See? He’s carrying the mine detector and putting up little flags. He’s alone; if it explodes, he’ll stay there. He’s wearing a mask and a protective suit. There’s another one. They’ve dug up one right here, of course. We went in here to look for a hidden spot, and when I saw the little flag, I said, “That’s it, thank goodness we didn’t go that way.” So we go back the way we came without stepping on anything strange. Backtrack now and behind me. God, what a fucking adventure, what a tense day, huh? You just can’t enjoy it like that. On top of that, Fernanda has diarrhea; she’s sick. There’s a man there. Are you there yet? He’s not there waiting for someone. Oh, God. And that’s why you can’t take the trails or anything, I mean, it’s super, super dangerous. They do it piecemeal and with the little infrastructure they have. So we hit the road. the way we came in. God, how scary. This way it is. And we’re leaving. There’s another one. Hello, hello Hello Tourists Spain Hello To Kabul, Pakistan Hello, hello Are you French? Spain, Spain, yes God. We’re not going forward like this. There’s no checkpoint that won’t stop us. Hello… Hello Passport? Can I take your picture? Oh, yes, no problem The passport Ok? Yes, yes And the visa? Don’t you have a visa? Come here Hello, hello Let’s go Oh my God. Is she your wife? She was telling me something about photos. Do we have photos, and I was acting crazy. God, wondering about the photos and I was acting stupid. Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye. Come on, little Taliban Those in the car are too, eh? Yes, yes, they were too. Look to the left. God, how’s it going, eh? They’ve dynamited them, those cars, God, they’ve bombed them . Well, another one. We didn’t miss a single one. If the Taliban stop us tomorrow, and we don’t make it, honey. Petrol. Petrol. Okay, Oh God, honey… We won’t make it, honey, we can’t stop any more times. Maybe tomorrow, if not, we won’t make it, right? They’ll stop us, and you go find out . Poor Fernanda, she’s sick to her stomach. I’m fit to be… She’s fit to be in bed, but there’s nothing here. Let’s see if we can get to the city, there’s a hotel. Let’s see if we can stay, and tomorrow we’ll get up early to get to Kabul. Okay? Turn around up front. Take a Fortaseg, honey. My stomach hurts, it really hurts, right, but a Fortaseg will stop your diarrhea, right? If not… We have medicine there. Where? There’s Fortaseg in the medicine cabinet. Where are you going to turn around there? Up ahead here, here, here better, here. Go ahead, come on. Oh, God. God, she’s repeating something to me. God, the truck is Danger. Fernanda’s tire has blown out. We have to go in more slowly, honey, I told you slower, slower, you’re going too fast. Okay, that’s it. Come on, let’s… let’s see how we fix it . Dress me slowly, I’m in a hurry. Going fast, you’ll ruin the tire, darling. Can’t you see they’re cuts in the road? They’re cuts in the asphalt. That, that will blow out and pinch your inner tube and everything. Let’s see, can we replace it ourselves? God, God, please, I really want to go now, baby. It’s not a question of whether you should go or not, it’s a question of being very careful, of not falling, of not getting a flat tire. You have to be very careful, honey, very careful, because now this, But I didn’t know, now I know, but, but you can’t run, but you can’t go that fast. I’m telling you, now, I’m telling you. That’s it. Let’s take the wheel off, baby.

El día mas duro en Afganistán, Fernanda enferma, entramos en un campo lleno de minas, no meten en un gran cuartel Talibán y reventamos una rueda. Un día para olvidar-Seguimos viaje.

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